3 quick steps to change your brain to a sleep mindset

Which of these statement rings true for you?

'It doesn't matter what I do, I always sleep badly.'

'Sleep's not a problem for me, I always sleep well.'

If you are reading this, then there is a good chance that it is the first statement! For a lot of people their insomnia will have started for a reason but it is the power of the mind that turns it from a temporary problem into a permanent one. Fortunately it is possible to use that power to change to the mindset of a good sleeper.

Good sleepers do not think about sleep, they accept it as part of their lives, they do not focus on it, obsess about it or talk about how much sleep they get. However these are subjects that an insomniac will focus on for hours on end and I know this, as it is what I used to do!
Here are 3 ideas to get you started in the process of changing to the mindset of a good sleeper.

1 - Stop clock watching.
Make the night yours and as long as it needs to be. If you constantly focus on the time and how little you have slept and how time is ticking away for you to get back to sleep, you are focusing on your lack of sleep and adding to your stress levels, which prevents your brain from relaxing and allowing sleep. If you wake and have no idea what the time is, you instantly allow more possibilities - perhaps you have only slept for an hour and have plenty of time to get more sleep, perhaps you have been asleep for hours already and you can doze a little before the alarm goes off. These thoughts are more relaxing and calming to the mind which in turn allows you to fall asleep more easily.
So switch your phone off, and turn your alarm clock to face the wall and allow the night to be as long as you want.

2 -  Be grateful for the sleep you do get.
It is all too easy to focus on how little you slept during the night, but hey - you slept, which is better than no sleep at all! Being grateful for the sleep you did get is a powerful step as it works in two ways. Firstly,what you focus on expands and by being appreciating the sleep you did get allows you to focus on sleep rather than the lack of it. Secondly, focusing on the sleep you did get changes your energy in a positive way. Say the following two phrases to yourself and see which one feels better to you - 'I only slept 4 hours last night, I should have got more.' or 'Hey, I got 4 hours sleep last night, I can cope with that!' you can feel the difference between the positive and the negative and it's the positive that is going to start changing your mindset.

3 - Think about the story you are telling yourself and others.
It may initially feel good to tell everyone that you are an insomniac and a poor sleeper as you do get some sympathy and attention. However the more you repeat this story the more ingrained it becomes in your mind and your personality. Though others may ask you each day how you slept and are concerned for you, it is putting you in the insomniac box and is that where you want to be? So the next time you are at work or with your friends and you are about to mention how badly you slept, ask yourself  'Is this what I want my story to be?' If it is not, change it to something more positive, or decide not to mention it at all.

These steps may seem difficult to do at first and I encourage you to persist with them, as you will be taking the first steps in reprogramming your brain for sleep!

Sweet dreams

The Benefits of Insomnia

It seems strange to say but there were a few things that I liked about being an insomniac. Yes, the sleep deprivation and its effects were not good were not good as I was constantly tired and exhausted, the grey circles under my eyes were not a fashion statement and I was always looking for the magic pill to make me sleep but it wasn't all bad, which is why I guess it took me so long to sort it out.

When you are awake in the middle of the night there is this strange feeling of being the only person in the world, that it is all yours. You look out of the window onto a quiet city, no traffic, no people, a silence that you don't normally hear and it seems very refreshing and calming and a time to enjoy the city in a different way.

If there is a lighted window in the distance I can feel some sort of connection with whoever lives there - we are both awake when everyone else is asleep.

I would be able to recall my dreams very easily and because I would wake so many times in the night, I could recall 3 or 4 different dreams in one night. This is something that I really do miss from my insomniac days (or should that be nights?) as now I can only recall one dream a night, so I make the most of lazy weekend starts and try and recall that one dream in as much detail and as far back as I possibly can.

As an insomniac you belong to a club, a club involving 10% of the population. It's something that you may discover in conversation "Oh, you're an insomniac too?" and suddenly you are in a whole different line of conversation that good sleepers can't join in! Now when talking about insomnia I feel like the 'virtuous ex smoker' hanging around in a cigarette break telling people not to smoke, or even worse - that I'm hanging around the in-crowd trying to be cool enough to fit in. I don't quite belong.

Then there is the feeling of martyrdom, of suffering while all those around you are enjoying themselves. "I only had 3 hours sleep last night, but I'll be fine. Don't worry about me." and waiting for the sympathy to pour in. Actually thinking about this, this is probably the one area I don't miss that much. Now that I see others doing it around me - it annoys me. Thank goodness I don't do that anymore!

When I was a teenager my mother was quite ill and often woke in the night and I would sometimes find her awake in the kitchen and we would sit and have a chat over a cup of (chamomile) tea before going back to bed. I used to call it 'Club 2.30'. It was a special time and gave me an opportunity to get to know her as a person rather than just 'Mum'. Memories of her I shall treasure forever.

So, as you can see there have been quite a few benefits for me of being an insomniac and I do miss them and writing this post makes me feel very nostalgic. However the benefits that I have gained from sleeping through the night do outweigh this and I am glad that I made the decision to change to a sleep mindset.

Sweet dreams!

Sleep deprivation

First of all, let me apologize for an absence of posts lately, I have been busy setting things up for my sleep coaching business, please check out my website, where you have access to a free guided meditation to help you sleep! Things are now back under control and I have more time to write blog posts!

I had an interesting conversation with a friend last night, actually that should be this morning, as it was around 1am, I am, as I have said before a night owl!

He brought up the fact that he wasn't an insomniac however he did not get enough sleep as he was always doing 'one more thing' before bed. He also mentioned the internet as being a big cause of this!

This got me thinking, we have heard a lot about how insomnia can lead to big health problems including weight gain, diabetes, stress, high blood pressure etc, but what does the effect of sleep deprivation have on health? In some ways insomnia and deliberate sleep deprivation are the same thing and a quick search through the internet reveals that yes, they do both have the same effect on your body.
So if you are someone who goes to bed late and therefore does not get enough sleep please read on for three surprising affects that may help you make more of an effort to go to bed on time!

It ages your skin. It seems that the term 'Beauty Sleep' holds true, and this should be enough to get everyone rushing in to bed to catch up on their zzzzzzz's. The first thing you notice is red and puffy eyes as well as grey rings under your eyes, and it can also lead to the development of fine lines. However lack of sleep also has more long term damage. When you don’t get enough sleep, your body releases more of the stress hormone cortisol. In excess amounts, cortisol can break down skin collagen, the protein that keeps skin smooth and elastic.
Sleep loss also causes the body to release too little human growth hormone. When we’re young, human growth hormone promotes growth. As we age, it helps increase muscle mass, thicken skin, and strengthen bones. It is in deep sleep when the growth hormone repairs the tissues in the body, are you getting enough deep sleep?

It makes you forgetful. Want to remain sharp and focused? Try getting plenty of sleep. Researchers determined that brain events called “sharp wave ripples” are responsible for consolidating memory. The ripples also transfer learned information from the hippocampus to the neocortex of the brain, where long-term memories are stored. Sharp wave ripples occur mostly during the deepest levels of sleep.

It impairs your judgment, especially about how much sleep you need! Lack of sleep can affect our interpretation of events. This hurts our ability to make sound judgments because we may not assess situations accurately and act on them wisely.
Sleep-deprived people seem to be especially prone to poor judgment when it comes to assessing what lack of sleep is doing to them. In our increasingly fast-paced world, functioning on less sleep has become a kind of badge of honor. However even if you think you’re doing fine on less sleep, you’re probably wrong. Studies have shown that even if you think your body has adapted to only six hours sleep, tests on mental alertness and performance show that is not the case.

So, if you wear your lack of sleep as a badge of honour, ask yourself is it really worth staying up to watch that tv show? Do you actually need to check that one last thing on the internet?
How about being kind to yourself and going to bed on time, aiming for 7 to 8 hours sleep, so you can wake up bright eyed and bushy tailed - ready to face the day! Check out my previous post about setting up a great bedtime routine to help you make the most of your sleep.

Sweet dreams!